How many times have we heard that? A lot?
In fact, I used to say it. Granted, I was an abege back then and it sure felt very mature and worldly to be saying, “Only God can judge me.” I would do whatever I’d like and then I would use the phrase every time people start giving me looks. It worked wonders, just like the get-out-of-jail-free card in monopoly games. People were afraid to be called judgmental, and so they let me get on with whatever I was doing at the time.
Everything was perfect, except for the part where I, too, was not allowed to judge others; because judging people is bad and only narrow-minded people judge others, right? Right? ”Only God can judge me” then became easier said than done. I tried to keep my reaction and my thoughts neutral every time I interacted with others. I really did try hard not to judge others. But I couldn’t, even though I didn’t like to admit it. It was like telling your brain to stop thinking. How could anybody do that? How could any human being stop doing whatever it is that makes us human in the first place?
Yes, I am saying that judging is a very human thing to do. Well, maybe not “human” human, but what I’m trying to say here is that judging is instinctive. It is a natural reaction. There’s no controlling it. I mean, even animals judge; lions would judge whether a hippo or a zebra would be an easier prey; broody hens would judge if there are any possible threats for their eggs; and so on.
In life, it is beneficial to know who you can trust and who you cannot; who you can be friends with and who’s better to be left alone to rot. It is also beneficial to know how different people will react to different situations, approaches and statements. And how do you figure this out? By judging; by observing them and then making a decision of what to do or what to say or how to react to them, and eventually coming to the decision if they’re good for your life or not. The ability to judge properly is, in a way, a survival instinct! It will help you sail through life safely.
So I have now come to a conclusion that judging is not only an acceptable thing to do, but also very very necessary.
We all need to judge others.
Or, let me rephrase that, we all judge others and we just need to admit it already! There’s nothing wrong with it.
Everyone that says they don’t judge people is a liar…at least in my judgment